I’m Wendy and I’m a Grumpus

I was a grumpus today. There was no way around it. I just was. I didn’t even have the energy to fight it. I just gave in to it. I know I’ve already mentioned that I’ve been sick. It’s gotten out of hand. I had to start antibiotics yesterday after the third straight night of coughing so much I would get about two hours of sleep. This, after taking cough medicine with happy juice in it!

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Soft centers

“Sometimes the strongest people are the ones who love beyond all faults, cry behind closed doors and fight battles that nobody knows about.” ~unknown

We’re watching The Office, starting at the very beginning, on Netflix. I think we might be on Season 4. We did the same thing with Seinfeld many years ago – we didn’t watch it while it was airing but watched the whole thing in syndication. We’re a little slow to catch on around here.

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Shine that light on yourself

I’m paraphrasing from a book I read a few years ago that I forget the name of:

“Think of the person or people you love most in the world.  Really picture them and think about the depth of love and caring and compassion you have for them. See their faces in your mind. Feel the completeness of that love in your heart and soul – how you glow when you think about them…

Now, turn that around and shine a little bit of that light on yourself.”

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On silence and solitude

“Solitude matters, and for some people, it’s the air they breathe.” – Susan Cain

I like to be at home. I thoroughly enjoy the time I spend with friends and family – it fills me up in an entirely different way. I need that, too. But, when I’ve had too many days in a row around people, I crave silence and solitude. I’m no hermit, but I’m not one to seek out places to go much. Silence and solitude rejuvenate me like nothing else can. It gives me perspective when I think everything is going so terribly wrong or I’m just a little off balance.

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A soft place to land

“Take responsibility for the energy you bring.”

― Jill Bolte Taylor, My Stroke of Insight: A Brain Scientist’s Personal Journey

This quote comes from the above book written by a brain scientist who had a stroke. She speaks of how she could feel the energy of the staff at the hospital as they entered the room before they even said a word. You’ve felt that energy from people, right? Me too.

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Rocky mountain high

I forget that this is what balance feels like when it’s been awhile since I’ve been at 100%. There’s no mental fog. This feels good. I have more mental clarity at work than I’ve had in months. I’ve been so productive! There are other benefits, too, but this is one of my favorites.

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Running with A.D.D.

It’s possible that I don’t have what would be considered A.D.D. today – but just a genetic propensity toward impatience and inattention. But I doubt it. I had A.D.D. (or some form of it) before it was a diagnosis. I still do. I did well in school despite it – probably because I went to a small school and had a good group of friends to keep up with academically. I have great parents who fed me well; made sure I was to bed on time, made me work and set a level of expectation for achievement. There were no medications. Even if there were, I don’t think anyone would’ve recommended I needed them.

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The next hundred days

Everyone needs a really good best friend. I’ve been lucky that way. Yesterday, I was at an all-day conference for the F.A.S.T. Diet Program I’ve been doing over the last couple of years. The thing that’s so different about this than any other program is it’s designed to be like getting advice from your best friend…only better.

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